Dawn French

Wednesday 5th November 2008

Comedy actress Dawn French talks exclusively to woman&home about friends and family and writing her book Dear Fatty

On her book
I've never done anything so solitary as writing my book. I completely went inside myself and nothing else mattered, which is very unusual for me. At one point, I didn't leave my flat for two-and-half weeks, stopping only to watch Big Brother. I love telly. I'm devastated that Big Brother is over, but I've got I'm A Celebrity… and Strictly Come Dancing to tide me over.

I've written about things that I've not talked about before. I had to investigate myself quite a bit. It takes a lot of squeaky, creaky brain activity to memorise so far back. It didn't change my view of myself, but I started to put together the pieces, like a jigsaw, of how I got to where I am.

When I look at the book, I think, “Yes, that's me”. But there are many mes. If there was a criticism of this book, from me, it's that I am a bit over-loving – if there can be such a thing. I love a lot of people, which is something I didn't know until I wrote the book. It's something I have to accept about myself.

On parenthood
Lenny [Henry - Dawn's husband] is a great dad. And he didn't have great examples of fatherhood around him, so he's broken the mould a bit. He didn't see a lot of great parenting, but he has lived his life deciding to change that.

My approach to parenting is that everything is open – everything. I'm not very good at covert, or subtle, and I've had to learn timing. I do blunder in a bit. If I think Billie's sad, or anything needs uncovering or unpicking, I have to learn to let things blow over, which they inevitably do, especially in teenagers' lives. Sometimes I've blundered in when she's a bit fiery and tried to work stuff out, when, if I'd waited, it would have just evaporated.

When I hear about people having IVF now, I really feel for them because I know how hard it is. But now I'm actually glad it didn't work out – otherwise we'd never have adopted Billie.

On friendship
My best friend is the most important girl, outside of family, to me. I met her when I went to college and we bonded immediately. I'd do anything for her at any time. We phone each other every day. I've also got a very strong group of girlfriends called the Lazy Susans that I absolutely wouldn't want to be without.

Jennifer is also a very important friend, but it's quite handy that we're not BFs. I feel like I will love her forever. I call her fatty, which amuses me because I'm the fat one. And the book is addressed to her. We've seen each other through an awful lot. But now that we're not going to be doing French And Saunders, we're going to have to seriously think about what we're going to do: neither of us can face the thought of this being the end of our working relationship.

On ageing
Why would I worry about getting older – what's to moan about? I look at someone a bit older than me, like Joanna Lumley – she's just a fabulous woman who does whatever she wants to do. You can't change it – so celebrate it. And it comes with liberations – I don't feel the need to be polite to unpleasant people any more. Equally, I don't feel I have to behave in a grown-up way – if you're not going to be silly now, you'll never have the chance.

See gorgeous photos of Dawn from our photoshoot.

Dawn French's new book, Dear Fatty, (Century, £18.99) is out now.
Read our review of Dear Fatty

Pick up a copy of woman&home magazine for the full interview with Dawn French. Read Dawn's letters to Lenny Henry and her daughter Billie, plus find out why she's moving to Cornwall, how she'll spend Christmas and how her father's suicide affected her.

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